Richard Ross, richard.ross@bhabbs.com writes: >*If God is watching us, the least we can do is be entertaining. %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% Charles Arthur, carthur@independent.co.uk writes: >The posting above is just this .sig's way of propagating itself %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% Brenda Mobley, bk.mobley@m.cc.utah.edu writes: >"Never met a flamewar I didn't like" %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% Michael Thompson, mthomps@nyc.pipeline.com writes: >**If the enemy is in range--- so are you. %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% ? [I lost the source] writes: >Q: How many Microsoft engineers does Bill need to change a light bulb? >A: None. He just declares darkness to be an industry standard. %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% David Wright, WrightD@rpm2.aes.mb.doe.ca writes: >What's the last thing to enter a bug's mind when it hits your windshield? >It's [butt]. %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% Brad Morrison, brad@neosoft.com writes: > "Push to test." > > "Release to detonate." %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% Kevin, hgcraig@slinknet.com writes: >********************************************************* >A much wittier reply came to mind immediately after I clicked the "Send" button. >*********************************************************** %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% Brad Hopp, bagger@hebron.connected.com writes: >Waking up the NSA watchers:SIGINT BALLISTIC TELSAT KGB GRU LIBYA SAM ATTACK >GRAIL IRA PLASTIQUE KENNEDY SPACE CENTER LUMINOSO TRAINING BGS GRENATWERFER %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% Travis jensen, jensen@lal.cs.utah.edu writes [borrowed .sig]: >USER, n.: >"The word computer professionals use when they mean 'idiot'." >--Dave Barry %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% Clayton Cramer, cramer@optilink.dsccc.com writes: >"Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to >teenage boys." -- P.J. O'Rourke, _Parliament_of_Whores_ >The Aztec contribution to our multicultural feast will be delayed, while the >main course stops begging for his life. %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% Charles Hunter, huntercr@expert.cc.purdue.edu writes: >Society without organized religion is like a crazed psychopath without a loaded >.45. %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% Chuck Ross, ckross@mcs.net writes: >This opinion is entirely my own unless this box is checked [X] %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% Spencer Weart, sweart@aip.org writes: >Ph.D. not M.D. >["I'm a Physics Doctor, not a Money Doctor" --old insult] %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% Larry Boynton, lboyton@unicomp.net writes: >The statement below is true. >The statement above is false. %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% Jeremy Tully, tully@pluto.njcc.com writes: >Customer: "I'm running Windows '95." >Tech: "Yes." >Customer: "My computer isn't working now." >Tech: "Yes, you said that." %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% Don McGregor, mcgredo@crl.com writes: >USENET posting IQ formula: start at 100 and subtract >10 pts for every cross-posted newsgroup. %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% ObHumorousStatement: Never do card tricks for the group you play poker with. ObHomorourStatement: If you love suasage & respect law, don't watch either being made. ObFunny: Famous last words: Don't unplug it, it'll just take a moment to fix. %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% I don't suffer from insanity. I enjoy every minute of it. A clear conscience is usually just a poor memory. %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% Who is General Failure, and why is he reading my disk? Old MacDonald had a computer with EIA I/O. Few women admit their age. Few men act theirs. Daddy, why doesn't this magnet pick up this floppy disk? Always remember you're unique, just like everyone else. %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% OK, I tried MS Windows once. But I didn't inhale. Drag me, drop me, make me feel like an object. Pound forehead on keyboard to continue ... Error, no keyboard - press F1 to continue. %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% Why are a fat chance and a slim chance the same while a wise man and a wise guy opposites? Politicians are like diapers. They both should be changed often (and for the same reason) It's bad luck to be superstitious. %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% Sterility is hereditary:if your parents didn't have children, neither will you. "Fast, Cheap, Good: Choose any two." Rule for a lot of things. %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% <<< Never trust a skinny cook!! >>> %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% Why should I grow up? This is more fun! %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% ... Dogs come when called, cats have answering machines! In the year 2000, the average computer will have 0.6 humans. %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% "I haven't lost my mind....it's backed up on hard-disk somewhere!". %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% Of all the things I've lost I miss my mind the most - Ben Moore %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% If you stick a stock of liquor in your locker, It is slick to stick a lock upon your stock. Or some joker who is slicker, Will trick you of your liquor, If you fail to lock your liquor with a lock. %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% Anything not nailed down is mine. Anything I can pry loose is not nailed down. %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% I am not a vegetarian because I love animals; I am a vegetarian because I hate plants. -- A. Whitney Brown %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% It has recently been discovered that research causes cancer in rats. %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% I am not a vegetarian because I love animals; I am a vegetarian because I hate plants. -- A. Whitney Brown %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% Australia was a penal colony. America was founded by God-fearing Puritans. In modern Australia, women frolic topless at the beach, and the age of consent is 16. In modern America, Christians set off bombs to kill people as directed by God, and 16 will get you 20. Who do YOU think got the better deal??? %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% *snip, snip, snip Ouch! paper cut* %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% Animals can be driven crazy by placing too many in too small a pen. Homo Sapiens is the only animal that voluntarily does this to himself. %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% Australians generally perform very well in Olympic swimming. This is because they are gentically selected. Every child is thrown in among the crocodiles, and the ones which can outswim the crocs are allowed to breed. Ian Lowery %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% Meddle not in the affairs of dragons, For you are crunchy, and good with mustard. %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% Just because you're paranoid, it don't mean they're not after you... %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% ("I had a dream last night that I ate a giant marshmallow... when I woke up I couldn't find my pillow!") %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% ASCII a stupid question, get a stupid ANSI. %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% Programmer, n. 1. An organism that metabolizes coffee into code. 2. A red-eyed mumbling mammal capable of conversing with inanimate objects. 3. Lobbyist trying to convince humans to adapt to their creations rather than vice-versa. %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% World Wild Wait %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% Ascii artists = "Keyboard magicians or makers of .sigfiles from hell?" %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% On 26 Aug 1997 aumal@imap1.asu.edu wrote: > Can someone please post a BUG of any kind. > > Thanks in Advance > > AL > > Windows95. -Nana %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% "A Computer Scientist is someone who, when told to 'go to Hell', sees the 'go to', rather than the direction, as harmful" -- R.M.Firestone %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% Actually, a forest fire is MUCH easier to control than a government. A fire cannot change the rules it operates under when it is attacked. A fire can't vote itself immune to water. %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% THE ASCII ARTISTS "Keyboard magicians or makers of .sigfiles from hell?" %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% May your life be filled with red tape, rude bureaucrats and inconsiderate in-laws! %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% Opening windows let's the bugs in. %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% "If opera is entertainment, then falling off a roof is transportation!" - Alfred E. Nueman %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% "I don't know art, but I kow what I hate; and I don't hate this." -Charles Montgomery Burns %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% I'm your worst nightmare, a theorist with a screwdriver. %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% "Almighty webmaster, grant me the serenity to know when to log off, the courage to know when to check e-mail, and the wisdom to stay away from chat rooms." %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% It is possible for your mind to be so open that your brain falls out. %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% i liked things better when i didn't understand them. - Calvin & Hobbes %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% As Thomas Jefferson once said, "One man's rights end where the next man's nose begins." %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% Friends help you move. Real friends help you move bodies. %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% Organic chemistry is the chemistry of carbon compounds. Biochemistry is the study of carbon compounds that crawl. -- Mike Adams %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% ...she uses sex, the way most people use breakfast. %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% > :) I like your smiley. How's that for a piece of original Iberian gallantry ? %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% The only thing more frightening than a programmer with a screwdriver or a hardware engineer with a program is a user with a pair of wire cutters and the root password. %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% I think I'm suffering from mood poisoning... it must be something I hate. %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% Nuke the Whales. ...But Save the Bandwidth. Fdisk (?) %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% There are three kinds of people: Those that can count, and those that can't....... %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% earth:~# shutdown --apocalypse 5 `/bin/cat ~/apocalype.msg` Broadcast message from god (console) Wed May 16 13:45:22 2000... Earth is shutting down in 5 minutes for a system upgrade. All users please log out or transfer to heaven.god.net or hell.god.net. Thank you. %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% I'm here to chew bubblegum and kick ass... and I'm fresh out of bubblegum. %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% It is nice to be important, but much more important to be nice %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% Do I believe in the Bible? Hey man, I've SEEN one! %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% "Hiroshima '45, Cherenobyl '86, Windows '95" -Author Unknown %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% On Thu, 4 Dec 1997, Randy Gardner wrote: > Just remember, there's nothing wrong with talking to your sel > it's when you butt in that you should start worrying. :-) I have to interupt myself otherwise I'd never get a word in edgewise. -Nana %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% "If you can't dazzle them with brilliance, baffle them with bovine excrement." %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% "It is practically imposible to teach good programming to students that have had a prior exposure to BASIC: as potential programmers they are mentally mutilated beyond hope of regeneration." Esdger Dijkstra %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% if you make it idiot proof, someone will just produce a better idiot.... %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% My other .sig is a Porsche. %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% alot of people are alive only because it is illegal to kill them %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% the Dilbert principle (people are idiots) %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% Beware of all enterprises that require new clothes. %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% "Anything that isn't nailed down is mine to take. Anything I can pry loose isn't nailed down." %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% If everybody else fails, read the manual! %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% made with unbleached electrons %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% Go buy a pint of Clearasil and have a zit party. %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% "Id never have sex - what would my children think?" %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% My opinions are my own, but I happily share them with anyone who can't run fast enough. %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% >What does >< >mean? Do your own will in heaven as in earth: now is the time for drinking! %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% "Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former." -- Albert Einstein %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% Drink wet cement and get really stoned. %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% NEW wrote: > Turn £7.00 into such amazing profits! Read the following letter and find [ 8< snip of the usual chain letter 8< ] Should be posted to alt.weight.loss An easy way to lose seven pounds!!! Ron Thompson %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% Why do they call it tourist season if you can't shoot the bastards? %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% So this chicken and an egg are in bed together, and the chicken is laid back with a cigarette hanging out of its mouth and a grin on its beak, and the egg is sitting on the edge of the bed with a disgruntled expression on its face, mumbling to itself, "Well, I guess that answers that question." %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% #define QUESTION ((bb) || !(bb)) - Shakespeare. -- Andy Johnson If you want to e-mail me, replace the ~ with a _ Finger thelaser(at)cyberspace.org for PGP key. ---------------------------------- Andy Johnson wrote: > #define QUESTION ((bb) || !(bb)) - Shakespeare. Which is not a question, but a true!!! Something either is or isn't '2b' =) Ojoshiro %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% To err is human, to blame your computer is even more human. %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% I think, therefore I think I am. %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% My goal in life is: Before I die, I want to make a bank manager cry! %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% Save a whale, harpoon a spammer. %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% Be careful what you wish for. You may get it. %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% "I'll take one with elephants." Derek Jacobi (I Claudius) %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% Again we must ask, why do you think they call the little arrow on the screen a "CURSER"? %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% If _pro_ is the opposite of _con_, what is Congress? %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% Please be kind to animals! You would not want them to spill your beans, huh? %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% We are the Bored. Resistance is futile. You will be assimilated. -- Shimrod %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% A life spent making mistakes is not only most honorable but more useful than a life spent doing nothing. --Unknown %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% G: "If we do happen to step on a mine, Sir, what do we do?" EB: "Normal procedure, Lieutenant, is to jump 200 feet in the air and scatter oneself over a wide area." -- Somewhere in No Man's Land, BA4 %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% "Fine art is that in which the hand, the head, and the heart of man go together.-John Ruskin %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% "What is time? The swiss manufacture it....french horde it...Italians want it.....americans say its money.....Hindus say it does not exist. Do you know what i say? Time is a crook.-Peter Lorre %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% -- Vs lbh pna ernq guvf lbh ernyyl bhtug gb trg bhg zber %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%